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I’ve run out of love for myself.
I’ve run out of luck to pull me forward.
I’ve run out of patience with others,
everything I’ve worked for is in the gutter.
Life has revealed itself in front of me,
I question my worth and what I truly perceive-
why I feel this dwindling shred of need,
to view it from a lens not filtered by misery.
Bite my lip, curse the years, mourn my greatest mistakes.
Nullify the logic in my head and hope for escape.
Watching warmth dissipate lets questions take flight.
Leaving all my confidence dug deep in the dirt.
And I’ve never felt this hurt,
my desire to leave became a fervor.
I pleaded on the cold shoulder of scorn,
won’t you please open your arms once more.
Simple questions, bare no answers.
No I can’t remember when our eyes first met,
mine have been sewn shut for far too long.
Don’t let this gold return to dust,
I’m not done.
There has to be a better future,
if I want one.
I want to ring out on a note worth leaving on.
Be a voice in the back of your head,
be a whisper when you’re gone.
released February 28, 2016
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